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cheekinpermission · 12 days ago
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I'm only *checks notes* five days overdue. Whoopsie.
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batshaped · 9 months ago
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your quality assurance professionals (suffering from plush hysteria)
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apomaro-mellow · 1 year ago
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Wrong Number 1
Eddie kept up a texting chain with Steve while making himself a breakfast of coffee and cereal. He hadn't felt like this in a long time. Not since, well, when he thought of it when he was a teenager up all night in chat rooms and forums. When you found someone who you just clicked with.
[11:30] Any advice on how to fry an egg with a perfectly runny yolk?
(11:32) You like runny yolks??? đŸ€ą (11:33) It's scrambled or nothing for me (11:33) Cant help ya even if I wanted to
[11:35] I just want an egg on my avo toast
Normally Robin fried the eggs for breakfast. Her yolks were always perfect. But unlike Steve, she'd actually scored last night and was still with whoever she'd gone home with last night.
Eddie couldn't help but roll his eyes at the cliche. A guy who jogged and then came back home for some avocado toast with an egg on top? He just had to let his stance be known.
(11:35) Next ur gonna tell me bout your acai smoothie bowl rite? (11:36) Avo toast? Really???
Steve realized how he was coming off and had to quickly amend it.
[11:38] It's not what you think! We only got the avocados to make some guac the other day. There was one left and I wanted to use it before it went bad. And I'm all guac'd out. Hence the toast.
(11:39) At least you didn't use the avocado to make like ice cream or some shit
Finished with his own, normal, regular, average citizen breakfast, Eddie cleared his place and started to actually get ready for the day. His shift went from 2 to 10 tonight, so he needed to prepare for the long haul.
While brushing his teeth, getting dressed, and making something for his lunch later, he and Steve kept up the texts. Through their conversation he found out Steve's favorite ice cream (peanut butter), that he could cook eggs just about any way except sunny side up, and that he lived with a roommate named Robin.
Eddie got to his place of work and in a place like that you need to have some semblance of focus and attention, so he told Steve he had to get to work. He realized he was basically saying 'busy now, text you later?' to a stranger he'd only started talking to last night. Steve was completely in his rights to end the conversation there.
He could've ended it at any time really. What obligation did he have to keep on talking to him?
[2:01] Okay. Talk to you later
Steve stared at the message, already in the middle of agonizing over it when Robin finally came through the door of their apartment.
"Good afternoon. I wanna feel offended that I didn't get any texts or calls asking if I'm okay but I'm gonna choose to think it means you trust me and are a great judge of character."
For the first time in a while, Steve checked the time and actually realized how long it had been.
"Shit, Robs, I'm sorry." It had been over 12 hours and he hadn't checked in on her. All because he'd been texting a random number. "So you had a good time?"
Steve had been sitting on the couch and Robin plopped right down, laying her head in his lap.
"It was magical. Like something out of a movie."
"Aren't you glad I made you go and talk to her?", Steve smiled smug.
Robin smushed his face with her hands with a groan. "Don't look at me like that. You were right, okay? Me and her hit it off like, like uh, one of your sports metaphors."
"Robin you were in a soccer league just last year, stop acting like you don't know sports."
"Anyway, something grand must've kept your attention off me. Things go well with that girl you were talking to?"
"Umm, yeah."
Robin sat up, eyes narrowing. "And you came back here with her? Gross! Steve! Did you do it on the couch?!" She shot up immediately.
"I didn't", Steve rolled his eyes.
It was one of their main rules. No sex in the common areas of the apartment. Steve wasn't gonna tell her about the wrong number given to him. And he especially wasn't going to tell her he kept talking to it. The following lecture would have been unbearable.
"She gave me her number and we've just been texting back and forth."
Robin slowly sat back down on the couch. "Just texting? That's all you did?"
"That's all."
"Wow. You usually move faster than that."
"Well, I want something a little more this time. But enough about my snail pace romance. Let's talk about you and that girl, what was her name?"
He and Robin sat a long while, talking about her night, eventually going out for lunch together too. Not-Misty had said they were at work, but Steve couldn't help himself when he saw that Robin had ordered a burger with avocado on it and Steve had gotten a taco salad that came with, you guessed it, avocado.
[3:14] image.jpeg [314] Okay me and Robin might have a problem. But I swear it's not on purpose!
"Did you just send a picture of our lunch to someone?", Robin asked.
"Yeah to uh, to Misty. We were talking about avocados earlier and I figured she'd get a kick out of it."
Robin smiled through her chewing. She teased but she was glad that her friend had made a connection last night.
Meanwhile, Eddie saw the message, but didn't have a chance to reply, even on his lunch break. Through all the texting, he had forgotten to charge his phone, so it was on the plug and he was leaving it alone for now while he talked to his co-worker, Grant. He went through the rest of his shift, thinking about Steve.
What did he look like? How old was he? Where did he live?
He got off and made his way back home, stopping off somewhere to get dinner. It was a sandwich shop and he honestly contemplated getting avocado on his just to see Steve's reaction but he resisted.
'I can't be that down bad that I'm overthinking food now', he thought to himself.
When he got back home, he turned the tv on and took out his phone to reply to Steve right away.
(10:31) Back at home now (10:32) Work was crazy (10:34) And the 1st step to recovery is admitting u have a problem (10:36) But thru hard work we can get you addicted to a sensible veggie (10:37) Like broccoli
He thought since he kept Steve waiting for so long it might take some time for a reply to come, but his phone pinged almost immediately.
[10:39] First of all, avocado is a fruit. Second, I eat plenty of other vegetables. And third, what happened at work?
(10:41) It may be a fruit but I dont want it in my smoothie (10:42) And some guy came in and started throwing axes at the wall
Sunday evenings were usually more relaxed. It was why Eddie typically didn't work Friday or Saturday nights unless he needed some extra cash or they needed someone on deck.
[10:44] Hold the duck up someone was throwing axes!! [10:44] *duck [10:45] *FUCK
Eddie snickered through his eating and had to take a moment to swallow before something came up. He always enjoyed telling people what he did for a living.
(10:46) Cool your jets man (10:47) I work at an axe throwing range (10:48) The problem with this dude was he didn't have an appointment (10:48) Just came in and started throwing an axe at the wall
[10:50] Are you okay? That sounds dangerous
(10:50) My uncle handled it (10:51) Eventually the dude left
[10:52] Oh wow. Well I'm glad you're okay. Axe throwing tho. What an interesting job for someone of your age? đŸ€·
Steve was lying in bed and he buried his face into his pillow as he sent it with the shrug emoji. It was so transparent, he knew it. But he needed to have a better idea of who he was talking to. That way when Robin did eventually find out, he'd be able to tell her something, anything.
(10:53) Smooth (10:53) I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours
Eddie knew now was the time to be cautious. But he was also curious as to how much Steve would tell him and just what he wanted to know. He wasn't disappointed.
[10:54] Male, 23, 5'11
It was like the bare minimum of information and yet Eddie was already aggressively tamping down any hope that he might have a chance. Without his permission, hope bubbled up anyway
(10:55) Male, 24 going on 25, also 5'11
Steve stared at the text with the mystery person, mystery man's information. It seemed like so little and yet so much. He still hadn't an idea of what he looked like. But now he could at least get a general silhouette.
(10:56) Ur not one of those guys who lies about his height are you?
[10:57] Robin says my hair gives me two inches but she has no idea what she's talking about.
Eddie was thinking about how Steve must wear his hair. It could be in a sizeable pompadour, or maybe a nice afro. Maybe it was in a bun all the time? That was not what he typed out however.
(10:59) You know what they say (10:59) It's not the size but what u do with it
Okay this was it. This was where Steve stopped texting him. You can't just say that to guys you don't know-ping!
Eddie bit his lip and only had one eye open as he looked at Steve reply, preparing for the worst.
[11:01] Oh I know how to use my inches
Eddie dropped his phone onto the table and had to get up and pace, touch his face, his hair, throwing his hands in the air. Was this flirting? This felt like flirting. He wished he knew for sure. Maybe it was the lack of emoji. Had Steve put a winking face, he'd know for certain. Eddie leaned against his fridge, staring at his phone, sitting innocently on the table.
On the other side, Steve was burying his face into his pillow, pretending he didn't just say that. Would it come off as playful? As flirty? As casual? Should he have sent a wink? The seconds ticked and it felt too late. Like coughing after saying something awkward.
God, he was so desperate. Why was he even still texting? He had work in the morning. He should start preparing for bed so he had any hope of getting up on time. Steve pushed off the bed and went to his closet when he heard the notification sound and instantly returned.
(11:05) Let's get out the measuring tape (11:05) image.jpeg
Steve felt his heart skip a beat. The picture attached was of the very top of mystery man's head. He was holding up a lock of long, curly hair into the air. Steve studied the picture like he was getting paid to do it. He couldn't see any lower than the bangs on his forehead but there was still plenty to see.
The rings on his fingers for one, how his curls went this way and that. Steve quickly saved it and then replied with a similar pose, holding some hair by the fingers as far as it would go above his head.
[11:07] image.jpeg [11:08] I think you have me beat
They texted for about an hour more before Steve finally decided to be an adult and put himself to sleep, bidding mystery man good night.
Part 3
Fun fact, years ago I worked at an axe throwing place and yes, what happened to Eddie did in fact happen to me! On like my first week too I think
Tag Team
@anne-bennett-cosplayer @estrellami-1 @newtstabber @omletlove @ifyoudonlysurrender @rehfan @morganski-19 @corvidcantina @dragonmama76 @just-ladyme @tinyplanet95 @lolawonsstuff @goodolefashionedloverboi @idoquitelikebread @kittydeadbones @manda-panda-monium @rhapsodyinalto @paintsplatteredandimperfect @keylime-green @ihavekidneys @samsoble @honorarybrit81 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @420-hun @aizawa-emma @deleataecount @thesuninyaface
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crybaby-bkg · 2 years ago
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Bakugou is willing to eat it in any position. You’ve learned this as time went on in your relationship, that no matter the place, time, or circumstance, he’d eat it anyway he could.
In some fancy bathroom at a hero gala, with you bent over the sink, your dress hiked up high on your thighs. Your face is this close to being smushed if not for the hand you have to throw up to keep from smearing your makeup. You pant against the glass, angling your body to watch how his blond tuft of hair moves rhythmically in the mirror when he licks you from clit to taint. You moan quietly when he leans back to spit on your hole, not realizing how disheveled he looks all the while. His hands are gripped tightly on the globes of your ass, spreading you, as he watches his spit dribble before he dives back in to lick it up.
On your kitchen counter, with your toes curled into the edge of the marble, your hands holding onto his hair for dear life. Bakugou holds you by the hip and tit as he works his mouth over your clit, sucking and licking at the swelling nub as he stares up at you from under thick blond lashes. He likes this angle where he can watch the pretty faces you make whenever his tongue lashes on your clit, and how your eyes always roll back when you realize he’s been looking at you the entire time.
On your side while you lay in bed on a hot day, forgoing any clothes due to the sticky heat. You’re tempting him, he tells you as he kneels on the floor beside the bed where your ass sticks up, right in his damn face—how could he resist? You’re not complaining though, as you hold one cheek open for him to lash his tongue against both holes, gasping in surprise when he groans against you, and dips his tongue inside of you as far as it can go. He pulls back with a smack of his lips and a bite at your pert little cheek, before he wiggles his tongue back inside of you once more.
Up against the wall after a night out, all sweaty and inebriated and drunk on the love you have for each other. He doesn’t even let you take your shoes off, just hikes your skirt up and places your thigh over his shoulder. He cranes his neck to slurp at your cunt, grunting when you pull his hair, licking at you with desperation to taste your cum flooding on his tongue as soon as he possibly can.
He loves it especially, when you sit on his face. With your thighs caging his head in as you ride his tongue and use him like the toy he is for you. Or when you turn around and really sit on his face, lightly playing with his neglected cock because the both of you know that right now, this is for him, and all he wants is for you to ride his face until he can’t breathe. He likes when you rub your scent all over his skin, rub your entire pussy from top to bottom, his nose bumping your clit all the while, his tongue out to catch whatever he can.
he’s just a feen for you and eating you every way he can basically.
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shrimpchipsss · 10 months ago
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foremost scholar of yuri theory
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fadelbison · 4 days ago
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Of Boats and Drama; The Turning Tides on Kant and Bison's Compatibility
obsessed with how when its during their make believe phase, when fadel says "I think I love you" to Style, Style doesn't say it back and instead just kisses him at the end of ep. 6 and during the kantbison parallel at the start of ep7 when Bison says "I love you" to Kant, Kant says "I love you" back but clearly there's baggage even if he's not lying outright.
But after the brothers kidnap their respective lovers its Style that fronts with the I love you that perplexes Fadel
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and its bison that wants to hear it
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but Kant jumps into the ocean instead (like you can see the beach front okay Bison is clearly devoid of killing intent here) instead of lying to him or say the same things he's been saying to dupe him.
I really think this is where the Kant and Bison compatibility is finally starting to show. Bison clearly loves his little fantasies and make belief of romance (just like style dear fucking god). I've joked before about how bison has given to his brother the lover he had envisioned for himself - the one who will plead his love, cajole and give in.
But that guy is wrong for him.
We've seen that slightly off dynamic between Kant and Bison for 6 whole episodes. And it's killed me that people kept trying to interpret them with the same rose tinted glasses that we do for Fadel and Style. Because the FadelStyle and KantBison relationship parallels aren't meant to highlight the similarities between the couples but rather the differences, that's where the information about these characters come from.
The audience knows something that Kant doesn't in the boat scene; which is that he has this in the bag already. I think this is the infamous island Bison inherited from his dad and he's brought him here to literally just talk. I know I mentioned this already but bison literally looks like he just untied the boat from shore and let it drift on its own while waiting for Kant to wake up.
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Like that has got to be the minimum legal distance that a boat needs to be from shore to be considered unmoored lol. This is 'I am using your vulnerabilities against you because love is pain' shore distance not 'dead body dumping' shore distance. The body will wash up on shore before the boat even makes it back.
But for Bison, Fadel's reasonable precautions while we talk approach was not enough. He needed the ropes, the guns, the added ocean trauma because the guns didn't feel enough to instill fear, the pretty necklace he put on just so he could rip it off his throat, everything is already high drama high fantasy for him. Bison set the stage for desperate begging and tearful confessions, things he already got at the hospital btw but that wasn't enough either.
Because.
Bison doesn't need to be sold on fantasies. He had that and it sucked for everyone involved, what he needs when he's totally out of control like this is this guy:
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[screenshots of Kant telling bison he wants to talk on land and he's scared of the ocean]
For six whole episodes I saw Kant be wrong for Bison and not be able to pinpoint exactly why people cawing over how cute KantBison are bothered me so much. Until, of course, Kant finally does something right and all of a sudden it just all clicks together. Bison is boisterous, headstrong and because of his unique skillset also irresponsibly dangerous. The BDSM scene also shows that despite his best intentions, Bison can and will abuse power if given to him irresponsibly.
He doesn't need the Kant that plays along with everything he does. He needs the Kant that Kant is to everyone but him. The person that Kant is when they're together is barely even Kant. He needs the calm, level headed but fiercely devoted older brother, he needs the guy that helps a hookup out because that's his duty as a human being, he needs the guy that stole cars to keep his family fed. And I'll be really honest, that's the guy that Bison loves anyway, the one he hears about from Babe and Style and James.
What Bison needs is the quiet devotion of Kant choosing his own personal hell over playing this game and furthering any deception between them even though technically it wouldn't even be a lie (Bison is literally poised to believe him); the dogged resolve that once he's decided to do this on his own terms, it happens on his own terms.
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bamsara · 1 year ago
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im finishing this draft so this is already rewritten but if anyone wants to see what i used as a placeholder for Narinder's dialogue here it is
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hoofpeet · 8 months ago
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buddie-buddie · 3 months ago
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Buck stands next to Bobby, his heart thudding in his chest as the stolen fire truck rattles to a stop at the edge of the freeway. The world around him buzzes with the chaos of flashing lights, wailing sirens, and screaming voices. But it all fades into white noise when he catches sight of the massive plane cutting through the clouds, a jagged hole ripped into the top of its fuselage.  
It’s not just the enormous plane and its terrifyingly large hole. It’s also the LAFD chopper hovering above it, its blades slicing through the air. 
The plane’s shadow sweeps over the freeway as the helicopter inches lower, positioning itself directly over the plane’s unintentional opening. Buck watches in breathless silence as the door of the helicopter slides open and a figure in a blue flight suit emerges, dangling from a harness.
The helicopter’s spotlight shines down, cutting through the dark, casting an almost blinding glow on the person being lowered. The figure sways slightly in the wind flying off the rotor, and Buck’s stomach drops, a wave of nausea rising in his throat. The person’s face is indistinguishable from here, but that doesn’t matter. Buck knows that body anywhere— the bulk of the shoulders, the legs built like tree trunks, the subtle confidence in every movement.
He knows that body when it’s wrapped around him, holding him close when the nightmares come. He knows how it feels to be tucked up against it, to hear the steady beat of its heart beneath his ear. He knows how it looks in early morning light, has memorized the way the shadows dance across that sharp jaw and those broad shoulders as the sun rises in the sky and bleeds in through the cracks in the blinds. He knows how it feels beneath his own, steady and solid and warm. He knows how it moves with him in perfect sync, just as he knows the way his own body shudders beneath its touch.
He knows it just as much as he knows the warm, rumbling laugh that bubbles up from its chest, just as much as he knows the crinkle of its eyes and the scrunch of its nose. 
He doesn’t need to hear it over the radio to know who it is. 
Tommy.
continue on ao3
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teecupangel · 2 months ago
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I just thought of something really gruesome.
So, was thinking of botw and totk and how you make tonics. And then thought of Des with Link’s powers. And had the thought. What if Des could make the potions from those games? But wait, that would require monster parts. And then l remembered a lovely line from BDG.
“And we all know the real monster is man. And cannibalism is frowned upon in New York.”
So if we were to say the real monsters are Templars. Well
..they’re not necessarily in New York? And the other ingredients are just things like flowers or bugs? Strength Pot Des anyone?
Cannibalism in this one XD
Desmond could have gotten some kind of ‘recipe book’ while dumpster diving.
He was just looking for stuff he could fix and use or maybe even decoration for his new small apartment.
He though the book looked alright. Didn’t have a name or anything in it and all the pages looked handwritten so he took it with him to read when he was bored.
Oh. And the small cauldron it was in looked good enough to use after some heavy scrubbing.
The first page looked weird.
It only said ‘1 monster part and 1 ~ 4 hightail lizard or hot-footed frog’
Monster part???
He thought of it as maybe just someone writing whatever they wanted, like some kind of story or something.
Until
 someone tried to break inside his home.
Now, Desmond wasn’t exactly a pacifist but he was also not a pushover.
And then the thief had the gall to call Desmond’s home a shithole because it didn’t have anything worthwhile to steal and tried to stab him because he thought Desmond might have some cash on him.
During the altercation, Desmond managed to cut the thief’s hand near the kitchen where he was making frog soup using that cauldron (the frogs came from an Asian store with a sweet old lady who told him that they were ‘farm frogs’, her English wasn’t that good, and that they were good to eat in a soup)
The thief ran away, Desmond finished cooking his dinner and ate it

Realizing he may have eaten the meat of what is absolutely not the skeleton of a frog.
Pretty sure it was a finger.
And that was the day Desmond became an accidental cannibal.
Fuck.
And because he was a slave to capitalist like everyone else, he had to go to work while trying to not freak out over eating a finger.
Maybe two.
Holy shit.
And then he wasn’t
 tired at all? Like
 he had to work overttime and he was still okay?
For some reason, his mind went straight to that book and about how “a monster part and 1~4 tiredless frogs” would give the drinker a boost on their stamina.
There was no way, right?
Right???
.
A month later, Desmond was mugged in some abandoned alleyway and he kicked the mugger’s ass. Unfortunately, during the altercation, Desmond plucked the mugger’s eye (heat of the moment, Desmond was trained to attack every weak point without mercy) and it was disgusting but then

What if?
He returned home, dropped the eye in the cauldron and looked for anything he could try (not him, there’s a stray cat outside the apartment, he could just leave the soup out and they’d drink it, no harm, no foul
 well, he had a human eye but that was beside the point).
There’s one that is supposed to make one faster and it needed ‘hot-footed frogs’ or ‘hightail lizards’. He went with lizards since he’d seen a few in the apartment just chilling.
He cooked the soup, went downstairs and left it by the dumpster.
He watched as the stray cat smelled it (he made sure that it was cooled before he left it) and began to lick it.
The cat’s licking began to be faster and then
 it
 It wasn’t like a cat that was zooming everywhere.
The cat was moving as normal.
But it was faster.
Holy shit.
Desmond just got some kind of witch brew book
 that counted humans as monsters.
And
 well

There were a lot of bad people in New York and Desmond wasn’t really raised to have a rigid moral code.
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mrghostrat · 10 months ago
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Big Name Feelings - 11/17
“She
 She recognised me,” he started, which Aziraphale interrupted with a shockingly loud gasp. “Yeah. From the panel selection thing. Knew who I was.” Aziraphale stared straight ahead as he floundered to process that information. Crowley was looking at him expectantly, but he didn’t even know where to begin. So, he just stammered, “Does that mean she’s read your eighty-thousand word incubus PWP?” Crowley barked out a laugh and didn’t stop until they’d moved a full pace up the line.  “Fuck! Who knows? Maybe!”
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fumifooms · 7 months ago
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My life’s been a lie. I need to know where the misconception that Mickbell & Kuro open a noodle shop post-canon comes from
Kuro and Mickbell’s profiles both talk about it as if it’s a store that sells a bit of everything. A variety store, ăȘんでも汋。
Mickbell’s sentence on the topic is çŸćœšăŻă‚Żăƒ­ăšăšă‚‚ă«ă€ăȘんでも汋を斶んでいる。 And Kuro’s is çŸćœšă‚‚ăƒŸăƒƒă‚Żăƒ™ăƒ«ă«ă“ăäœżă‚ă‚Œă€ă€ă€ă„ăŁă—ă‚‡ă«ăȘんでも汋を斶む。 No mention of noodles whatsoever. "Currently running an all-purpose shop with Kuro." "He is still being worked hard by Mickbell, and together they run a store that sells everything."
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I thought maybe the confusion was because Mithrun’s profile had a similar wording that made people think it was the same thing, but Mithrun’s line straight up doesn’t mention anything about a store or noodles either, so. The assumption that Mithrun opens a noodle shop is fully from the comic about Fleki asking Mithrun to be pardoned, where really he only says offhandedly he’ll try making some.
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Mick and Kuro’s Knicks Knacks!! It does suit them real well. I just wonder where they get their stock

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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year ago
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Okay so-- i was reading some sagau posts and came across this one where the reader was an army vet and my brain just Did Its Thing--
So now I'm here to inflict this on to you--
Would guns be considered as catalysts. And would they only do Phys Damage.
Me reading this ask:
đŸ˜¶ 😐 đŸ€š 🧐 🧐 😰 đŸ„Č đŸ˜­đŸ˜­đŸ˜­ 💀
STOP YOU'VE INFLICTED ME WITH PSYCHOLOGICAL DMG FROM THIS ASK 😭
(Also srry took so long to respond, when i didnt realize how short this was/was just sitting over here 😓)
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^ For the sake of gun imagery being a lot/maybe staff might hate me for it,
we'll put this gay shit instead (i almost mispelled to "gay shot" lmao)
☆
Sun: Army Veteran Reader, Gender neutral Reader (you/they/them)
Orbit: SHORT Headcanons
Stars: everybody bc i think itd be funny
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: gun stuff, mild violence, mild cursing & Trigger Warnings: Gun fun everywhere
THIS ASK HAS ME GIGGLING TO MYSELF LIKE A MANIAC
You're out here having a whole gun they let you take for off-base
And u ofc have a license so u can conceal carry
(idk how non-american gun laws work, but tbh ours are so fucked idk how they work here either, just that an army guy i knew once could have his gun when he got back home)
And ofc ur just paranoid enough (more like it just makes u feel safe)
That when u get yoinked into a portal to a silly little brightly colored gacha game fantasy world, the gun comes with 💀
Id like to add in my silly little "ur in a video game, so video game rules" AU version of genshin so:
The only other gun (ish) wielder (Mika) has unlimited bolts
Sooo I'd think your gun would be the same jfc lol
NO BC YOUD SCARE THE ACTUAL SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE IN UR VICINITY IN A BATTLE
BC GUNSHOTS ARE A DIFFERENT TYPE OF LOUD
When u first stumble into abyss monsters/hostile creatures of the realm, u nearly scare off a Lawlachurl bc every shot's like thunder to these bitches😭
So not only the monsters but the vision holders think u fucking summoned lightning
OMG THE BULLETS ARE SO FAST THEYD PROBABLY NOT SEE IT
ESP BC DISTRACTED BY GUNSHOT LOUDNESS
SO U AIM THIS LITTLE BLACK CROSSBOW (???) AND THINGS JUST DIE (OR GET RIDDLED WITH HOLES) WITH NO CLEAR ARROW STICKING OUT
STOPP- you're becoming a witchy god or smth to all of Teyvat bc it just looks like hella high level magic atp to them LMAOOO
Rumors of you get out of hand and say u just point or snap ur fingers and things get wounded/just die on the spot 💀
Oh another difference between Teyvatians seeing ur gun vs. crossbow (what they know)
Is that guns are wayyyy more destructive
Like an arrow would get shot but it'd bounce off of things like rock or wood or metal, maybe dent a little depending on how close
But a bullet goes thru that shit so easy, and leaves a whole little explosion behind, once again depending on range
(I once saw a Mythbusters episode? of them proving bullets would definitely go thru car doors, like movies lied to u, this is why drive-bys acc work like for gangs)
Lmao, the image of you in like full armor with a Teyvat made automatic gun after showing it to blacksmiths
Makes u just more convincing as a god, esp bc military training
(Ppl like Gorou and Kokomi begging for military tactics/training ur world has done)
...
....Ok.
I'll address it.
But only so u dont think im stupid later.
Yes, the Fatui have guns.
No, this not the same as having a glock LMAO
End of story.
(Also, urs runs on bullets, whereas the Fatui rely on magic/delusions to power theirs, plus they dont seem as fast or destructive as urs, more "explosions aimed at you" than real bullets)
Which,,, u leave the managing of ppl copying ur gun to ppl like the Qixing or smth, but make sure to give them advice on good gun laws if teyvat accidentally revolutionizes bc of ur advanced gun that anybody can wield (non-vision users)
Thats the best ive got abt that
Oh, also enjoy being praised as a War god now.
:)
☆
... dammit i had smth i was gonna tell u guys-
Uh what tf was it, it was important
OH
Next post is the Eldritch God Oneshot! Look out for it :) !!
☆
Safe Travels Kid,
đŸ’€â™’ïž
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sleepoutro · 2 years ago
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brisbane2
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artbyblastweave · 3 months ago
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I feel like something I've seen the broad outline of- and I could very well be Making Up A Guy To Be Mad At Here, but this feels like at least the bones of something- is that you've got a culture online that goes in big on making jokes about killing conservatives, sexists, homophobes, transphobes and the like, but specifically in an American context, fundamentally people who're venting about their unaccepting parents or peers specifically, or allies trying to be supportive by cheerleading that sentiment. And then an ongoing genocide comes along where the (real or imagined) regressive gender politics of the population under target becomes part of the legitimizing mythology for the slaughter. And suddenly some people have some circles to square, which they square with wildly varying levels of grace and self-awareness
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